When Parents Hurt

This book was hard to read. Not hard as in "wow, I don't know what that word means, I better drag out the ole Merriam Webster," but as in "does this guy know my mom and dad?"

Hard as it may have been, I'm glad I read it. My mom and I have had some interesting conversations stemming from my reading this book. I feel like we have even ironed out some things, because of this book. Not only that, my mother has had some personal insights into her own relationship with her mother. As it turns out, this book may have inspired 3 generations of healing. I'm not sure I can give a better review than that!

Although the book appears to be written for parents of adult children, there are a number of people who might find help in the pages. For me, I found insight into how my relationship with my parents influences how I parent my children. There are several quiz-type questions that are extremely helpful in identifying similarities between you and your parent (chapter 13). And personal stories that provide some descriptions of common parent/child situations and conflict that are easy to identify with.

I also feel like the book has armed me with information when it comes to parenting my (future) teen aged children. Not only in what to provide them (rules...so they know they are loved and protected, but not too many rules...otherwise they will feel stifled and controlled), but in what I can do for myself in the process of parenting teenagers (be compassionate with myself and forgiving).

This is an excellent book, a resource that I will keep with me for many years.

Finally, if you do not dissolve into a puddle of tears after reading Dr. Coleman's essay "When a Family Man Thinks Twice," you might want to check your pulse. What a beautiful, moving essay. What a wonderful, insightful book.